Submitted for your approval: The Postmodernism Generator. It generates a new postmodernist critical essay. Compare with the real-life postmodernist critical writings.
This is the primary reason I have no interest in pursuing an advanced degree in either of the subjects I love -- literature or history. I can't make myself write in the accepted academic style.
Nor am I alone, apparently. The number of people getting graduate degrees in history in the United States is about a thousand a year -- up from a low of just over 500 during the early 1980s, but still below the peak of 1,200 in 1973-74 (when the big bolus of Baby Boomers was pushing its way through the gastrointestinal tract of higher education). Doubtless there are many factors involved, including pay, tenure, and so forth. But right now we're in a golden age of mass-market history. There's a cable network about it, and books about interesting but obscure historical topics are best-sellers (right now a book about Henrietta Lacks and her immortal cancer-cell culture is a hot seller on Amazon).
So why are there about a thousand people getting history doctorates while 87,000 people apply to law school each year? Sure, you can (maybe) make more money as a lawyer, but there's obviously a market for popular history. I think part of the answer is that academic writing has become so hieratic that people (like me) who can't make ourselves spout the right gibberish simply go on to other things. It's sad.
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